For this reason, the Prophet (pbuh) emphasised
that people’s psychological
conditions and sensitivities be considered. He said,
“Do not stare at a leper.” (Ibn Majah, Sahih) A leper
is not attractive
to look at and hence, it is inappropriate that if he
passes by
a group of people that they should stare at him, for
this would
remind him of his affliction and hurt him further.
One occasion which beautifully demonstrates the Prophet’s
consideration for people’s sensitivities is the way he dealt with
Abu Bakr’s father when heading to the conquest of Makkah with
the Muslim army. Abu Bakr’s father, Abu Quhafah, was a blind
old man. He said to his granddaughter, “Dear daughter, take me
to Mount Abu Qays so I can see for myself the truth of what
they are saying, and whether Muhammad really is approaching
or not.”
She took him to the mountain and then he said, “Tell
me,
what you see.”
She said, “I see blackness approaching us.”
He said, “Those are the horses.”
She said, “I see a man going back and forth in front of
that
blackness.”
He said, “He is the man responsible for leading the horses.”
She said, “The blackness has now spread.”
He said, “By Allah, this means that the horses have nearly
approached Makkah. Take me to my house quickly for they have
said that whoever shuts himself in his house is safe!”
The girl brought him down the mountain, but they were intercepted
by Muslim horsemen before they could reach home.
Abu Bakr went to his father and greeted him. Then he
took him
by his hand to the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) in
the mosque. When
the Prophet (pbuh) saw him, he found him to be an old man whose
body had weakened and bones had softened and who was
close
to death. Abu Bakr looked at his father, who he now saw
after a
long period of separation, for he had been apart from
his father
in the service of his religion.
The Prophet (pbuh) said to Abu Bakr out of kindness, “Why didn’t
you leave your old father at home so I could come to see him
instead?”
Abu Bakr knew that they were in the middle of a war where
the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) was their leader. He also knew that
the Prophet (pbuh) had very little time and too much to accomplish
to visit the old man’s house and ask him to accept Islam. Hence,
Abu Bakr thanked the Prophet (pbuh) and said, “O Messenger of Allah
, it is more appropriate that he comes to you than for you to
go to him.”
The Prophet (pbuh) sat Abu Quhafah down in front of him very
kindly, placed his hand on his chest and said, “Accept
Islam.”
Abu Quhafah’s face illuminated, and he said, “I testify
that
there is no one worthy of worship but Allah and that
Muhammad
is His servant and messenger”, and Abu Bakr rejoiced as
he had
never done before. The Prophet (pbuh) gazed
at the old man’s face
and noticed that his hair had turned grey, so he said,
“Dye his
hair, but do not use black.”
Yes, he would take psychology into consideration when dealing
with others. In fact, when he entered Makkah, he had divided
the army into battalions and had given the banner of one of the
battalions to the heroic Companion Sa’d bin ‘Ubadah – may Allah
be pleased with him. It was considered very noble to carry the
banner, not just for the carrier but also for his people. As Sa’d
was looking at Makkah and its residents, he reflected upon how
they had fought against the Messenger of Allah (pbuh),
put him under
unbearable strain, turned people away from him, murdered
Sumayyah and Yasir, and tortured Bilal and Khabbab. He thought
that they surely deserved to be taught a lesson! Sa’d waved his
banner and said, “Today is the day of slaughter! Today your
inviolabilities
will be attacked!”
This was unbearable for Quraysh. They feared that he
might
exterminate them all. Hence, a woman stepped forward
and
complained to the Prophet (pbuh) about
Sa’d in words of poetry,
begging him to prevent Sa’d from shedding anyone’s
blood.
When Allah’s Messenger (pbuh) heard her poetic words, he was
moved and felt pity. He didn’t want to disappoint her,
just as he
didn’t want to anger Sa’d by taking away the banner
from him
after having honoured him therewith. He therefore
ordered Sa’d
to hand over the banner to his son, Qays bin Sa’d, whom
Sa’d
was riding alongside, as they entered Makkah. Hence,
the woman
from Quraysh was happy when she saw that Sa’d was no
longer
carrying the banner, and likewise, Sa’d was not angered
since he
remained the leader of the battalion, except that he
had spared
himself the burden of carrying the banner and had thus
given it
to his son to carry instead.
How wonderful it is to kill two birds with one stone!
Try not to lose anyone. Try to successfully win over everyone
even if there is conflict of interest between them.
Harmony...
We deal with hearts not bodies.
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